Blossom and Plans....!

'Gently does it, ease yourself along..." Uncle Humperdinck was sitting aside a branch in the pear tree holding Aunt Mildred's hat for her, as she edged along the branch towards him. 'No need to rush My Dear, we'll be settled in minute.' Most of the gnomes were already comfortably nestled on their branches, but Aunt Mildred had been busy making a poultice for poor Humbert's gouty foot and was the last to arrive.

They were having a meeting to discuss the Mid-Summer Revels which were fast approaching. Long ago, The Council of Elders had realised that holding a meeting in the branches of a tree in blossom time, resulted in a much better outcome!

Hortensia had settled on holding the meeting in a wild pear tree as a seasonal treat. The soft white and pale pink petals and the warmth of the morning sunlight were intoxicating, and for ages the gnomes just rested on their branches, gazing into the beauty of the blossom all around them.

'Time to get down to business then' said Archibold, and with that Aunt Mildred passed around the mint humbugs. 'Nothing like a humbug to help one think' she muttered.

Soon the little tree of blossom was pervaded by the strong scent of mint and the sounds of loud sucking.
'Whose in charge of the marquee, and are we having a theme this year, that's what I want to know?' Archibold knew that he would be put in charge as usual of finding the perfect canopy for he marquee, (his skills at finding the right plastic bag to make the tent secure, waterproof and striking to look at, were legendary), but he wasn't too keen on a theme.

They all remembered the year that Aunt Mildred had decided on a Rabbit Rodeo, and the large number of carrots that they had been forced to borrow - as well as the trouble they had had from the rabbits for months afterwards. (Aunt Mildred had been watching television through the old lady's patio doors when she had thought up the idea, and though Hortensia had tried to persuade her that rabbits were not horses, and gnomes very different to humans - Aunt Mildred had won the day that year.)

Hortensia quickly spoke, ' I think that it would be wonderful to have the helter-skelter adventure ride again as well as the usual games.' So it was decided in minutes, lots of enthusiastic volunteering and hat tossing as the gnomes remembered the dangerous excitement of the helter-skelter ride through the tree tops and down to the games ground.

'Aunt Mildred, I think that you should present the prizes along with Archimedes, if we can persuade him to come along.' Aunt Mildred glowed, surely now she had the perfect excuse to make a new ceremonial hat! 'Well if you are sure, I could of course contribute towards the prizes?' Wild cheering from all the gnomes confirmed the decision as in the best interests of the whole community, and soon they were all scampering home to plot and plan the most perfect Mid-Summer's Day Revels ever held!

Blue bells and a Birthday tea!

Archibold was out and about on a little jaunt, today was his Birthday and he was rather proud of the new tweed jacket that Hortensia had made especially for him as his Birthday present, and that he was wearing for the very first time.

He was pleased too with all the extra pockets that she had placed in the lining. 'Never can have too many pockets you know, never know when you might need a bit of string or dried moss', he had smiled his especially happy smile which Hortensia knew meant he wasn't just being polite, but really did like the jacket.

She had made the jacket from an old tweed cap that Archibold had found abandoned on the bank of the stream. 'Waited two days as is polite, then said to myself, no time to let it rot, best to take it home to my Hortensia!' Now he was wearing the smartest jacket he had ever owned and sporting a large daisy on his collar that Hortensia had given him, so that everyone would know that it was his Birthday!

'Today is my Brithday' Archibold announced to the plants and trees as he passed. Truth to tell he was more than a little excited, 'best be a bit nippy today, Birthday tea in the bluebells later, mustn't be late for that!'

Gnomes take Birthdays very seriously, as you know they take celebrating in general very seriously, so a Birthday nearly always involves a party and lots of dancing and singing. What Archibold didn't know was that one of his best friends, Hector, was making a trip home just for his special day.

Hortensia had sent a long letter, kindly delivered by a sprightly sparrow, to Hector where he lived on the balcony of a block of flats in the nearest city. 'I don't think Hector, that he remembers that this year is a special year, he has never been that good with numbers, so he won't be expecting you to make the trip home at all, and it would be a perfect Birthday present!' Hector adored an adventure, and after checking all was well with the bulbs and plants on his balcony and in the local park, had set off at once.

For the truth was that Archibold was one hundred years old! Now, to you and I, one hundred seems very old indeed, but to a gnome, though a significant Birthday and one to be seriously celebrated, being a hundred was not very old at all. Gnomes can live a long time, and maybe as Aunt Mildred was fond of saying, 'best not to take time too seriously, its how you live it that makes it long or short...' was really true!

In any event, up in the glorious blue haze and sweet scent of the blue bells, table cloths were being laid out, swings tied on to branches, 'hoop la' and 'toss the hat' and other games pitches being measured out. Best of all, an enormous Birthday Tea was being prepared with a delicious hazelnut cake carefully being wheeled over on a cart  - Archibold's favourite of course!

Elevenses and Spring time treats.....

'Very busy time of year, very busy indeed,' Archibold had popped back home for elevenses and a piece of cake, and of course, to deliver the fresh new dandelion leaves he had collected his way home. 'Some of the gardens, Hortensia you wouldn't believe how neglected they are, no bedding plants in and so few buds.'

Archibold took his gardening responsibilities seriously, long ago he had realised that once he had taken the great step of choosing to look after a garden, well, then that was that - he was committed for life to both to the garden and all plants within it, and often to the human that cared for it too! Of course humans could put out statues of gnomes in their gardens thinking they might entice a gnome to become a Head Gardener, but as Aunt Mildred frequently remarked 'just because they have a statue out doesn't mean they deserve a gnome!'

For as you can imagine, to a gnome's way of thinking, humans often have the strangest ideas about gardening - and if we are honest, about gnomes themselves. 'No use thinking they are just like us, similar but different, that's all you have to remember, similar but different!' Aunt Mildred was often wise, sometimes grumpy too it has to be said, but mostly wise and kind. 'Poor things they are just so big and in such a rush they forget to look and listen, how they think they can garden without looking and listening - well, you only have to look around to see the results!'

Hortensia winked at Archibold, Aunt Mildred had come round to borrow something, but as she couldn't remember what it was she needed, she had decided to stay and have a cup of tea and a slice of apple cake instead. 'Can't ever remember a Spring so late, no time for snoozing now the buds are on their way!' this last remark was aimed at Uncle Humperdinck, who grateful for the very comfy chair had dozed off. 'Marmalade My Dear, it was quince marmalade that you wanted to borrow, I wasn't asleep at all My Dear, just trying to remember!'

Soon it was time to be on their way, and off they all set. Hortensia had strapped Baby Harriet on her back safely tucked into her basket and Archibold had a large sack of dandelion and cow parsley seed to put out and about. Uncle Humperdinck and Aunt Mildred were setting off home with an enormous pot of quince marmalade between them and a basket with a few dried apple rings just in case they might be running out.

'See you all later' called out Hortensia, 'Stephanotis is coming over for his tea and bringing his bagpipes!' The sun was beginning to come out for the first time in ages and the gnomes knew, this time for sure, Spring was on it's way.....!

The comfort of a snug and happy home....

Archibold was sitting by the fireplace watching the crackling fire as he soaked his poor feet in a bowl of warm lavender water. 'You are a treasure Hortensia My Dear, my feet feel better already.' Hortensia smiled, she was heating up the soup for their evening meal, 'just been so cold and damp for so long Archie, hard for your feet to always be in clammy wet boots day in and day out.'

Archibold sniffed the air as Hortensia lifted the lid and the sweet smell of onion and barley broth filled the air, 'don't feel damp or cold now My Dear, downright toasty inside and out!' he slurped at his soup and smacked his lips with delight. Hortensia had given up years ago trying to curb his enthusiasm for soup, and was now resigned to accepting that all slurps and burbs were a sign of great contentment and appreciation.

The two gnomes sat looking into the flickering flames, usually at this time of year, their friends would be dropping by, and the air would be full of excitement at the news of the latest buds and flowers that they all had spotted that day. 'The bluebells have started to show their leaves, that's something to look forward to, best we wait for Spring to finally come by keeping warm and planning an escapade or two.'

Hortensia agreed, the truth was that the unseasonal cold was becoming exhausting. 'Its not that I don't see how beautiful it all is, but frost every morning at this time of year is a little wearing....' Hortensia's voice faded away as she realised that the room was filling up with sounds of soft snoring and the occasional snuffle - Archibold was sound asleep.

'Fancy falling asleep with his feet in a bowl of water, he must be very tired indeed!' Hortensia gently lifted his feet out of the water and wrapping a shawl around them, placed them on the rug.

She sat back in her rocking chair looking into the glowing flames, 'seems the poor earth is tired too' she thought 'perhaps it needs a rest as well, humans are so busy these days and doing so many silly things, perhaps they need some dream time too....nature is wiser than us, best to go with how things are...' and with that Hortensia found her eyes slowly closing as she too gently drifted into a little snooze. 'Must start on my embroidery, nearly Aunt Mildred's Birthday and she will want to wear her new hat.' But her head kept nodding forward and soon she was fast asleep - the little room began to fill with the sweet air of adventurous dreams and the snug comfort and peace of a happy home.

Dancing into Spring.......

'What a to do, what a to do....' Hortensia was muttering to herself as she eyed the huge pile of fresh wild garlic leaves that Archibold had proudly brought home after his morning forage. 'I really only needed a few leaves.......' Suddenly she knew what to do with the unexpected surplus, 'a party, that's what, we'll have a party, and I can use all the leaves for a lovely dish of cheese and garlic bake!' Hortensia tied on her lucky blue apron, the one with little red hearts embroidered on the hem and set to washing the leaves.

Archibold was presented with a lump of really rather hard cheese and an old roll when he returned home for lunch, Hortensia had even prepared a long list of invitations for him to deliver as soon as he had finished his cup of tea. 'Nothing like a Start of Spring Party' said Hortensia, 'best to give everybody lots of notice so they can plan what they are going to wear.'

Gnomes are mostly quite practical about clothing, but as Archibold remarked later that afternoon when he was flopped in the rocking chair exhausted by delivering all of the invitations, 'not often we get a chance to wear something bright.' Like all gnomes, Archibold and Hortensia honoured the old code that all the creatures of the forest lived by, and only wore clothing that blended in with their natural habitat so as to be as inconspicuous as possible. 'Thats why parties are essential Archie, can you imagine never having an opportunity to wear your red velvet waistcoat again?'

Hortensia was quite red in the face herself from the effort of making ten large dishes of rolled garlic leaves stuffed with fresh cheese, herbs and breadcrumbs in a cheese sauce. 'I'll have to start putting them in the oven soon, and then there is the bramble crumble to finish, oh my oh my, so much to do!' Archie smiled at her as he offered to be in charge of keeping the oven hot and baking the delicious treats. 'More than enough My Dear, you really have excelled yourself his time!'

Hortensia dashed upstairs to cool her face and choose her outfit for the evening ahead. 'Such a relief to be having a supper party, no need to set the table and just think of the dancing!' Downstairs Archibold was keeping an eye on the dishes in the oven as the glorious smell of cheese and garlic began to waft about the house. He began to lift the extra chairs of their wooden pegs where they hung high up on the walls. All gnomes keep extra chairs in case visitors come by, sensibly storing them out of harms way high up on the walls of their houses, but conveniently within reach from a small step ladder.

'Ta da da, ta ta da ta!' Archibold whirled around holding a chair as his dancing partner when he suddenly stopped in amazement, Hortensia stood in the doorway, she was wearing a glorious blue dress the colour of a summer sky and Archibold knew with all his being, that he just had to sweep off her feet for a little dance of happiness..............

Nettle tea and honey flapjacks........

Hortensia and Archibold were sitting by the fire enjoying a delicious cup of tea. 'Oooh Archie, I do love our morning cup of tea, and such a lovely pot of the very best nettle top too!' Archibold smiled - long ago they had decided that every day - unless on an escapade - that they would stop whatever they were busy doing and meet up for a morning cup of tea at eleven am. Eleven in the morning is just the right sort of time for a refreshing cup of tea and a proper sit down to organise the day.

Archibold took great pride in collecting leaves for Hortensia's teas, and the first tender tips of spring nettles were her most favourite of all. Archibold liked to gather them early in the morning, of course he had to be careful because nettles are quite tall, and the stems most prickly and could give a terrible rash to a careless gatherer.

Humbert, Archibold's father had taught him how to lasso the plant tops without hurting himself. 'There you go boy' he used to shout, Humbert was very keen on shouting - and singing - whenever possible, 'Swing the rope over your shoulder and bring the tip down!' Of course, as you can well imagine, it was easier said than done and poor Archibold had found learning an aggravating experience, especially as Humbert would accompany all of his attempts with loud shouts of 'one, two, three and away she goes!' and other, sometimes rather rude, comments.

However, now that Archibold was an expert forager and had human gardens of his own to look after, he could bring home lots of special treats for Hortensia to blend into her teas. Hortensia was very proud of Archibold's prowess and in return would bake the special honey flapjacks that he absolutely adored.

'Very tasty indeed My Dear' Archibold mumbled, 'helps keep the damp out'. Not that gnomes are particularly prone to damp, but as Archibold then said 'you can never be to careful at the end of a long winter, damp gets about, nasty thing damp.'

Hortensia agreed, she had seen her Mother, Wispy, become quite bent over with the effects of damp. Wispy was short for Wisteria, but as everyone knows, Wisteria is not thought of as a proper name for a young gnomette because it rhythms with Hysteria - and any thought of hysteria was thought of as rather a bad omen for an adult gnomes temperament. Besides Wispy's hair was always floating out of her hats in gentle golden curls, so Wispy suited her very well indeed.

' Thank you Archie for the lovely fresh milk, perhaps a saffron custard might be nice for tea?' Archie's eyes twinkled, he had been thinking about a custard when he brought home such a big jug of milk, ' just perfect My Dear, just perfect!' And with that he kissed Hortensia and Baby Harriet and was off out to tend a wild rose that needed pruning!

Spring sunshine and mending hats.........

One fine Spring morning, Hortensia decided to sit in her rocking chair by the open kitchen door with a large basket full of hats, her sewing basket, her precious box of extra ribbons, and her wool bag - all arranged about her.

Hortensia was involved in a very important job - inspecting and mending her family's hats. Now that Spring sunshine was a possibility, sorting out and mending hats seemed a necessity. You would be surprised at how much needs to be done to keep a hat in tip top condition. Of course most humans think that gnomes just wear pointy hats, but, as we well know, gnomes wear hats of all shapes and sizes and made from all kinds of useful and practical materials.

'First' thought Hortensia 'I'll tackle Archibold's fishing hat, it gets the most wear and tear and is really beginning to look a disgrace.' She had carefully unearthed Archibold's favourite hat from his basket of fishing tackle, 'best he doesn't know that I've got it yet' she thought as she carefully began to darn a large hole where the hat been snagged on a branch. Archibold hated his hat being mended, he liked things being just the way they were and been known to complain vigorously about enforced changes to his favourite hat.

In fact when he saw his mended hat later that afternoon, he was quite cross, 'I'd liked my hat the way it was, I liked the feeling of fresh air on my hair, Hortensia I wish you wouldn't mend my fishing hat.' Hortensia just smiled, she knew that when it was wet and windy and he was out in his boat, that he would be very grateful not to have a large hole where the rain could soak his hair. Archibold stomped about a bit, but soon forgot all about his hat once it was back on his head and he was sitting eating a big bowl of onion soup for lunch.

Hortensia had also mended his best hat, which she had left out for him to admire. 'See Archie, I've put new feathers in the brim and given you a new ribbon and silk lining'.' Archibold was very impressed, 'Hortensia, that's the best it has ever looked, and it's much more comfy now,' He strutted about a bit looking important, holding his head up so that the purple ribbon shone and the feathers looked most impressive. After all, best hats were for High Days and Holidays, so wearing a hat of character could certainly boost a gnome's confidence when out and about or dancing a reel.

Hortensia was particularly proud of the silk lining and ribbon, she had found the silk handkerchief wet and abandoned by a careless human by the side of a picnic table. 'What to do?' she had thought,  'it would make such a good eiderdown cover, but no one would see it, I shall save it and use it for mending hats!' Now that she saw the results of her handiwork, she knew that she had made the very best decision!