Nettle tea and honey flapjacks........

Hortensia and Archibold were sitting by the fire enjoying a delicious cup of tea. 'Oooh Archie, I do love our morning cup of tea, and such a lovely pot of the very best nettle top too!' Archibold smiled - long ago they had decided that every day - unless on an escapade - that they would stop whatever they were busy doing and meet up for a morning cup of tea at eleven am. Eleven in the morning is just the right sort of time for a refreshing cup of tea and a proper sit down to organise the day.

Archibold took great pride in collecting leaves for Hortensia's teas, and the first tender tips of spring nettles were her most favourite of all. Archibold liked to gather them early in the morning, of course he had to be careful because nettles are quite tall, and the stems most prickly and could give a terrible rash to a careless gatherer.

Humbert, Archibold's father had taught him how to lasso the plant tops without hurting himself. 'There you go boy' he used to shout, Humbert was very keen on shouting - and singing - whenever possible, 'Swing the rope over your shoulder and bring the tip down!' Of course, as you can well imagine, it was easier said than done and poor Archibold had found learning an aggravating experience, especially as Humbert would accompany all of his attempts with loud shouts of 'one, two, three and away she goes!' and other, sometimes rather rude, comments.

However, now that Archibold was an expert forager and had human gardens of his own to look after, he could bring home lots of special treats for Hortensia to blend into her teas. Hortensia was very proud of Archibold's prowess and in return would bake the special honey flapjacks that he absolutely adored.

'Very tasty indeed My Dear' Archibold mumbled, 'helps keep the damp out'. Not that gnomes are particularly prone to damp, but as Archibold then said 'you can never be to careful at the end of a long winter, damp gets about, nasty thing damp.'

Hortensia agreed, she had seen her Mother, Wispy, become quite bent over with the effects of damp. Wispy was short for Wisteria, but as everyone knows, Wisteria is not thought of as a proper name for a young gnomette because it rhythms with Hysteria - and any thought of hysteria was thought of as rather a bad omen for an adult gnomes temperament. Besides Wispy's hair was always floating out of her hats in gentle golden curls, so Wispy suited her very well indeed.

' Thank you Archie for the lovely fresh milk, perhaps a saffron custard might be nice for tea?' Archie's eyes twinkled, he had been thinking about a custard when he brought home such a big jug of milk, ' just perfect My Dear, just perfect!' And with that he kissed Hortensia and Baby Harriet and was off out to tend a wild rose that needed pruning!